Beyond the Buzzwords: What Therapy Actually Feels Like

What does therapy really feel like - beyond the clichés and Instagram quotes?

This blog explores the emotional texture of therapy: the awkward, the grounding, the unexpected - and why nuance matters in the healing process.

Therapy isn’t always soothing. Sometimes it’s disruptive.

People often come to therapy seeking relief: from anxiety, stress, shame, confusion. And sometimes, therapy does bring that - a sense of calm, clarity, being met.

But at other times, therapy feels… uncomfortable. It can be exposing. Awkward. It might shine a light on things you’ve carefully avoided - behaviours, beliefs, or emotional patterns that feel painful or hard to face.

That discomfort doesn’t mean therapy isn’t working. Often, it’s a sign that something meaningful is starting to shift.

A thought-provoking sign asks, "What did his therapist say?" prompting reflection on mental health communication.

Not every session is a breakthrough.

Some sessions bring new insight. Others feel like treading water. This is part of the process. Therapy isn’t a straight line - it loops, spirals, circles back.

The sessions that feel ordinary or stuck can be quietly foundational. They allow space for something deeper to emerge, even if it’s not immediately obvious.

Your therapist might not stay neutral.

While some people expect therapy to be a blank-slate space - where the therapist just listens and reflects - that’s not always the reality.

Many therapists (myself included) work in a way that’s more engaged, more collaborative, and gently directional. That might mean noticing relational dynamics in the room, offering a challenge, or naming something you’re circling but not quite saying.

You're still the expert on your own life - but you're not doing the work alone.

A woman engages in a thoughtful conversation with her therapist, discussing personal insights in a comfortable setting.

Change doesn’t always look how you imagined.

You might come to therapy hoping to feel “better.” But over time, that goal can start to evolve. Instead of “better,” you might begin to feel:

• More connected to your emotions

• Less reactive in old, triggering situations

• More able to set boundaries

• Less tangled in guilt or self-blame

• More at home in your own experience

The change is often slow, quiet, and cumulative - until one day you catch yourself responding differently and realise: something’s shifted.

So, what does therapy actually feel like?

It feels like making space for parts of you that don’t always get airtime. It feels like showing up, even when it’s hard or uncomfortable. It feels like starting to trust yourself. It feels like being real - with someone who can meet you there.

A notebook lies open on a wooden table, displaying a handwritten question: "Am I good enough?" alongside a pen and pencil, capturing a moment of introspection and self-doubt.

If you’re thinking about starting therapy…

I work with adults who want more than just coping strategies - people who are curious about the deeper patterns behind their thoughts, feelings and relationships.

My approach is warm, collaborative and grounded. I draw from integrative methods - including Gestalt, Person-Centred and Transactional Analysis - to help make sense of what’s going on, at your pace. Together, we can look at what’s working, what’s stuck, and what might need to shift.

I offer remote and in-person sessions, with daytime and evening availability.

Book a free introductory call

If you're wondering whether therapy with me might be a good fit, you're very welcome to book a free 15-minute introduction call. There’s no pressure to commit - just a chance to ask questions, get a feel for how I work, and talk through what you're looking for.

👉Book here.