You deserved an apology. Maybe more than one. Maybe from someone who pretended nothing happened. Or someone who brushed it off. Or someone who didn’t even notice the hurt they left behind. But the apology never came. And that still hurts.

Awareness is powerful—but it’s not magic. You’ve done the work. You’ve read the books. You’ve gained insight. You know what your patterns are. So why do they still show up? Why are you still people-pleasing? Still avoiding rest? Still getting pulled into the same spirals? If you’ve ever felt the sting of “I should know better by now”—you’re not alone. And you’re not failing. You’re being human.

You know the advice. “Be gentle with yourself.”“Talk to yourself like you would a friend.”“Practice self-compassion.” And yet… something in you resists. You try, but it doesn’t stick. It feels fake. Uncomfortable. Even unsafe. If this sounds familiar, you’re not failing. You’re not broken. You’re likely protecting yourself in the only way you know how.

ou tell yourself:“I’m fine. It’s not that bad.”“I’ve dealt with worse.”“There’s nothing to be anxious about.” And still—your heart races. Your stomach flips. You can’t focus. You feel wrong, even when your brain says it’s fine. Sound familiar? If so, you’re not broken. You’re not failing. You’re not weak. You’re just learning that anxiety doesn’t live in logic.